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Have you seen how he was sucking it?

Monday 21st Mar 2022

Thought I saw roadkill at the bus stop this morning. Turned out it was just my hair getting in my eyes. Maybe it isn’t a good thing I’m getting my own hair mixed up with dead animals.

We had an assembly. It was about self portraits and how we see ourselves and how others see us. I thought it was going to be an inspirational talk about how to be the best version of ourselves. Turns out they just used it to complain about how some people weren’t wearing the correct uniform. Of course they made it about that, I wouldn’t expect any less from a school assembly. I remember one time they managed to link the Ed Sheeran song “Shape of You” to the Bible or something. How do you manage that?

Joseph told me about how he accidentally poured orange juice into his cereal instead of milk this morning because of how tired he was. We’ve all been there. I remember when I once did something similar. I was a good boy at school this one time and my mum gave me a KitKat. I got a bit mixed up and put the chocolate in the bin and ate the wrapper instead. I was very sad about that.

Edward has stopped bringing in stuff from his bin from home to show us and for me to write about because his mum keeps wondering how the bin keeps getting magically emptied without anyone touching it. This means my daily entries will probably be shorter from here on.

Some girl sprayed perfume in science. I felt like I was having an asthma attack. I don’t even have asthma. I probably will do now.

Alvin was sucking on a lollipop. He turned around and called me gay. Have you seen how he was sucking it? He looks way more gay than me. He was sucking it like it was something else.

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