top of page

Surely that’s not normal.

Sunday 3rd July 2022

Last night was weird as shit. My brother had a mate over, and we all had a laugh and a game of poker. I don’t mean to brag, but I did win a game. Four quid I got. Not bad. That wasn’t the weird bit though. My brother got a bit excited and showed us his hidden trick. He can squirt liquid out of his nipples. I thought that was fucking mental. I didn’t know blokes can do that. Bit concerned though, because surely that’s not normal.

Just googled it and turns out it’s a symptom of breast cancer. He says it should be fine because he’s been able to do that for six years and he’s fine. I still think he should get it checked. Even if it is all okay, seeing a doctor can’t hurt. I will chase him up on it later and persuade him to because you never know.

Squirting out of your nipples when you aren’t pregnant, or a bloke isn’t normal. I tried it on myself to see if I could. Nope. Nothing comes out. There’s definitely something wrong with him.

But anyway, that was yesterday. Today I realised something. I've never seen a dog vomit. I imagine it looks pretty weird. Dunno why I thought of it. Probably because you always see your dog's vomit on the floor, but you never see them actually do it. Can't believe this is the shit I resort to writing about when nothing happens.

bottom of page